- We’re preparing for the spring ball, which is funny because I know Terellion said it was too early to plan much while we were on our trip, but as soon as we get back, it’s suddenly time to start talking about it. I don’t understand him sometimes. It was the same day, kind of. Anyway, we’re planning now. I’m kind of not very interested in planning it. I guess I’m sad a bit, but I’m trying not to be. I just don’t want anyone asking me about color schemes or what kind of food to make.
- The part I still love doing is the music. You have to play each part once through to enchant it to play back, and at the end, you have a whole bunch of enchanted instruments that will play each part along with the others. I went to Silvermoon to find some new sheet music because I think it would be nice to have a few new songs. While my music education did include composition, I wasn’t that good at it, so I think it’s best that I leave writing the music to other people. I have a little help this year doing the enchantment too. I caught Keyalenn playing the piano near the front entrance a few weeks ago, and he’s actually pretty good, and has had a music education similar to mine with multiple instruments. He’s also in Theronil’s enchanting class, so it will be good practice as the spells used have their roots in both enchantment and other useful arcane spells. I offered it as a way for him to gain extra credit if he helped. He has agreed to do it, so we’ll work on that during his private lesson time.
- While I was in Silvermoon getting the sheet music, I decided to go to the library, and found out they were having a book sale on old books. I looked through the magic ones first and I found some workbooks for arcane theory to give to the students to let them work from. There were also a bunch of text books that weren’t too much out of date. I’ll still be able to use most of them anyway. I found one for myself about chronomancy, though the spells in it do not appear to have roots in the Bronze Flight, but it will be good to study from, and who knows? Maybe I will find something useful in it. I also found a book full of funny spells like ‘flatulence aura’, and ‘create mustard elemental in a dragon shape’. It’s an entertaining book to say the least. There’s also a spell for turning milk into candy in it, which is interesting. I wonder if I can get it to work with chicken?
- I had my last long trip with Terellion during the goblin holiday. We went for two weeks to the place Aeramin had mentioned taking Imralion to. It was really expensive. I didn’t want to run into him and Im, so Terellion and I went in another time, which is really handy as we can go for two weeks, but really only be gone a few seconds. It was really nice there. We didn’t have to leave the room for anything, but we did to walk on the beach and stuff. It’s probably not the very last long trip, but I talked to him while we were there. I feel really guilty about making him older for nothing. I didn’t tell him that because that’s too close to mentioning why we were trying to make him older, and I don’t want to get into that again. I’ve felt rejected enough! I do think it helps with the continuity of lessons and things going on at home. It’s easier to live there if I’m actually there, if that makes sense. Anyway, that’s what I told him, and I think he was a little sad. We do still take trips every day, but they’re only for a day or two, so it’s not like our time alone is gone. He’s just not aging a year in a month anymore. I do think it’s helped a lot with the lessons, and I’m more able to keep to my plan and I’m more patient with the students.
- While we were on our trip, I avoided too much conversation about babies. He keeps bringing them up! He wants to get one, which would be great, if I knew it was really ours and no one would take it away. I told him the first time he brought it up that they don’t allow people to adopt if they’re not married. I think it’s to prove you can provide a family for the child, and they like papers to back it up. He started talking about getting someone to give us one they didn’t want, but what if they change their mind? I don’t want to go through getting attached to one only to have it taken away. I’m not pressuring him to get married though, so I can’t say anything. He keeps bringing up babies anyway, so I keep trying to change the subject. It’s like he’s trying to torment me with the fact we’re not married!
- Anyway, that’s upsetting and I want to think about other things.
- I talked to the rangers about sending out information about the school for younger students here to all of the estates. I’m having some papers printed for it so they can just drop them off at each inhabited home. So far, our only student is Vaildor, and I know he can’t possibly be the only kid between 5 and 50 out here. Hopefully the rangers will be able to help us reach more so they at least know there’s a school here, and that it’s free.
- I also put up new flyers to find another apprentice mage. Maerista’s old room is still empty, well usually. One of the rangers wanted to stay there instead of a tent for the holiday, and now Mae is actually back in it because she had her baby here at the school. Zaeris, her baby, is really cute, but I’m sad to see babies right now. I just have to accept that the only kids I’ll have are my students. I have to get better at accepting that it’ll be fifty years or whatever before he thinks he’s old enough to get married, and maybe I’ll be too old to raise a baby then. I’m working on just forgetting about it. It’s not easy when he keeps bringing up babies.
- I’m thinking about it again. I should work on my lesson plan instead.
Monthly Archives: February 2015
Zaeris is here. It’s finally sinking in that I’m really a father. The past week has felt a bit surreal, like it wasn’t really happening, but I knew it really was. I guess that doesn’t make much sense. Anyway, I’ve spent much of the past week making sure Maerista has everything she needs. I made a couple of trips home to get some things, but we’re staying at the school for a bit. She was here when labor started, and I was out on patrol. I knew it was a good idea to make sure she was around people who could help get the priestess if she needed! We’ll probably be going back home soon. I am a bit worried about leaving her and Zaeris alone to go on patrol. What if something happens while I’m not there? I suppose we’re close enough to the school that she can get help quickly, and soon, she’ll go back to work there anyway.
I’m trying not to worry too much. He’s so tiny though, and he and Maerista mean everything to me. I’ve gone through losing everyone who ever meant anything to me before. I don’t think I’d make it through losing them, so I worry about that. I know things are safe here for now, and it eases my mind some to know that I’m helping to make sure that things stay safe for everyone.
I’m really glad I stayed to be a ranger out in the Ghostlands. I kind of agreed on a whim. I was planning to help with the rebuilding here, which I still have a little, but I’ve found it quite rewarding to know that the work of the rangers is what allows the rebuilding to happen. I’ve made some great friends with the rangers, and I feel like this is my place, like I belong there and I’m part of the team.
Well, I’m out in the ‘boring ghost forest’, as mother calls it. I haven’t seen any ghosts, even with Sanimir’s insistence that there are ghosts in his house. I’m staying with him. He’s still insisting on being called Hethurin too. I’m staying in one of the guest rooms that he claims is only slightly haunted. I haven’t seen anything. The room is actually very nice. The food is great too.
I arrived yesterday, after stopping in town to check on Lani. She was fine last night, and I went to get settled in. This morning a message arrived for me early. Her labor had started! I’m at her place now. Contractions started early in the morning, before light, so she’s trying to rest a little in between this afternoon. She and the baby are both doing great so far. I’ve given her some safe herbs to help with the pain a little, as well as to help her rest. I also gave some calming tea to her husband. Their adopted son, Vaildor, has been fairly helpful in running errands and fetching things.
I’m very excited about having a new nephew or niece. I still can’t tell which! There are ways to guess, but half of them say it’s a boy, and the other half say it’s a girl, so it really could be either one. He or she has a good strong heartbeat. I can’t wait to meet the new baby.
I think everyone else is excited too. Hethurin has stopped by three times already. He’s been busy informing everyone by teleporting all over. He’s going to tire himself out if he’s not careful! He brought our father with him the last time, but as I said, Lani is doing well, and the baby’s heartbeat is good and strong. His or her head is down, and it’s just a matter of waiting now. He’s waiting out in the other room just in case there’s an emergency and we need a million healers. Really, there’s about that many here already. We shouldn’t need that many.
Lani’s worried about the pain getting much worse. I told her it might, but it generally doesn’t last long. I’m certain that she’ll do fine.
Patrols have been quiet, and everything seems well in the area. There are two newer people with the rangers, Kavia and Yara. Kavia has been patrolling with Arancon and myself. Yara has been going with Nessna and Perothis. I guess Yara is Nessna’s first husband’s sister. That must be weird for the Captain, but she seems like a good ranger. She’d be better if she used a real bow instead of a crossbow, but I can’t say too much because the Captain approves of it enough that he’s buying crossbows for some of the others! Just because I can’t say anything doesn’t mean I have to like it!
Arancon has been talking a lot about his grand-daughter. We all call him ‘Gramps’ now. He’s upset that his son doesn’t seem to care at all for his daughter. I think it might take some time because she was a surprise to him. I guess he and his son haven’t gotten along in a long time.
The other day he was asking me about camping and it was really weird. He wanted to know what I wished I had for camping that I didn’t have. I’d really like a new bedroll, a blue one, so I told him that, but then Lin started asking me while we at the faire if we discussed camping! I was confused at first because I didn’t know how she would know that we did, but then I guess she asked him to ask me so he could find out what I wanted for a gift and tell her. So complicated! Then she asked me anyway, so I guess I really don’t understand still.
I told her the same thing. I hope I get one!
The faire was a lot better this time. I was a bit nervous because she seemed like she hated it last time, so I wasn’t sure why she wanted to go again, but it went okay! More than okay. We camped in the woods there.
We got our fortunes done there. Mine said I’d receive a gift. I hope it’s a blue bedroll. It would match my tent. We also went to see all the animals. They have a few lizards, but theirs are a lot bigger than Blinky. I still haven’t thought of a better name for him, and I didn’t see names for their lizards, so I couldn’t steal one. They should name them and put the name plate on the edge of their enclosure. We talked a long time while watching fireworks. They had them a lot!
The next day I went to the school before patrol and asked if we could stay there the night. There’s one room free with a private bath, so we’re going to stay there. We’ll also be eating there for a private supper. I asked for a portal to Silvermoon, and there I bought some candy and ordered flowers. I was going to write a poem about ears to put on the flower card, but I forgot the words because I didn’t write them down. I also stopped by a jewelry shop and got some earrings. They’re gold with rubies, and they’re kind of small, but the dangly ones were too expensive. I think she’ll like them.
I also have a pair of short, tight pants for after supper and the real gifts. I think she’ll like them too!
- Maybe I shouldn’t talk to people about it. I just wind up more upset. I went up to the ranger building to see my father the other night. He wasn’t there, but Lin was. I was starting to think of her as sort of a sister, I think. I honestly don’t know. I’ve never had a sibling. Anyway, I wound up talking to her. She’s told Im to leave me. I wasn’t mad that she had. I mean, if someone had done that to someone I cared for like a sibling, I’d advise the same thing.
- Of course, I don’t want him to go. He already knew about this. He knew I cheated, and we had worked through it. Things were going great, then that witch abandoned a baby on our doorstep. I’m still mad, and the more I think about it, the more I hate Lyorri, which isn’t really fair to her, but none of this has been very fair to anyone.
- I’m still stopping by to see Kes every few days. She always asks if I want to hold the baby. I don’t.
- It’s made me think about what kind of information on Im’s parents might be found in Dalaran. I’m almost dreading finding out now. What if his parents are like me? Hating the situation so much that they can’t stand being around the kid? I suppose it’s possible they were left because his father didn’t have enough money or something. Maybe he was a homeless drunk and left them with the Matron so they’d have a better life.
- He’s the one who thinks I should make sure Lyorri knows who I am. Now, a few weeks later, I’m not sure that’s a good idea. She’s going to hate me. Wouldn’t it be better to let her think of who I might have been rather than hating me because I didn’t want to be a father to her?
- I’m really afraid of what might be found in the Dalaran records.
- Anyway, I did get to speak to my father the other night. The goblin candy holiday has started, and I thought I needed to get something great for Imralion. I figured since Arancon and Maena used to argue quite a bit, but never split up that he might have some ideas. Of course, the first thing he did was point out that he never once cheated on my mother. Sometimes I wonder if he remembers that even though he didn’t, she did. Maybe he’s selectively forgotten it. I’m not bringing it up either way. He did have some ideas for me. He thought that getting a room in a fancy place with really good service and some pampering would be good for both of us. I pointed out that while it sounds nice, I don’t have the gold for that sort of thing. That’s when he said I should ask rich friends for a loan, and admitted that he used to ask people for loans when he wanted to get Maena something that he couldn’t afford. I asked how he paid them back, and he said he didn’t. I told him that if I did borrow, I’d have to pay it back. He said not to borrow too much then.
- I don’t know what I was expecting. We talked a bit about the situation too. He still thinks I should raise Lyorri myself. I really don’t think that’s a good idea.
- I did think it was a good idea to go on a trip though. I mean, I thought it might help to get away, and just be with Imralion alone. So the next day, I started trip planning. First, during lunchtime at the school, I asked Hethurin for a loan, or rather and advance on my pay, since he’s my employer, I thought it would be easier to pay him back because he could just keep what he owes me at the end of each week. He wanted to know what for, and I told him a bit about it. He seemed really interested then, but I made him swear not to go there with Terellion while Im and I were there. Anyway, he agreed and gave me the advance. Then I asked him for a portal to the island so I could find a place to reserve for later this week.
- I got there and I visited a couple of places before I found the perfect one. They had rooms with giant heart-shaped baths, a sauna, waxing, facials, manicures, pedicures, massages, and meals brought to the room. It was right on the beach, and close to the Sunwell. It was perfect, so I reserved the room and everything that came with it. It was really expensive, but I gave them half up front, which was a big mistake, as it turns out.
- Im was home early and had come to the school to wait while I finished with my afternoon lesson. Kestrae came up to get food to take back to her place at the same time. I don’t know how long they were able to talk together before I finished, but I sat down with them. The topic turned towards the holiday, and what we planned. It was going to be a surprise, but then I thought Im might not like surprises of any kind right now because I know I sure don’t, so I mentioned it. He gave me one of those looks like I was out of my mind. I don’t think he thought it would be nice. I just wanted him to feel like a king. I told him I’d cancel it. I went this morning and did just that, but they wouldn’t give me back the money I had already given them. That was to hold the reservation, so I’m now I’m stuck without pay for a few weeks too.
- I have another idea. I can use what’s left of the money that Hethurin loaned to me to pull it off.
- I’ve spent a couple of months thinking about it, and I still can’t figure out why he would talk about adopting a baby before talking about getting married! I think if he’s not ready to get married, it’s not a good time to get a baby. Maybe he’s trying to upset me. I don’t know. I really wish he wouldn’t. Now I lay awake at night while he sleeps next to me, and I just wish I knew why.
- I’ve been sleeping poorly for the past few months. It’s only been a couple of weeks to everyone else though. We’re still going to other places and times every night. We go for about two weeks, but it’s only a few seconds here. Every day, he and I both age two weeks. That’s about three months per week, and over a year for a month!
- I don’t know how old is old enough for him to want to get married. Sometimes, I think I should stop taking him with me, but then he’d be upset, but I’m upset by making him older for nothing. I have no spells to slow down his aging. I only know of ones that work on the caster, so I can only slow mine. I never intended to spend this much time in other times and timelines anyway. I mean, yes, sometimes I get upset and it’s nice to get away, but I’m still able to come back to take care of the things I need to take care of. If I had known how to do this before, I might not have left Aeramin.
- Staying with him would have been a really big mistake. He’s a good friend, so I guess it’s kind of weird saying that, but it would have been. I think we make great friends, but I think our personalities clash too much to be great partners. I don’t know. I don’t really think it would have worked out very well if I had stayed. Especially now that he has a baby. I knew the second I saw the baby that it was his, and I’m sure she’s here in the future. She’s really cute, but if I was still with him, I think I’d be really angry.
- But now I’m wondering if staying with Terellion isn’t a mistake. Maybe I shouldn’t be taking him with me. He’ll always be younger than me, whether I take him with me or not. I don’t want it to be wrong to stay with him, but he’s being pretty mean about it by telling me we should adopt. I don’t think most places let people adopt unless they’re married anyway, so I told him that, but I didn’t want him to think I was saying that because I wanted to press the marriage issue. I think it wound up sounding like I was, so I just shut up about it. The last thing I want to do is pressure him into marriage, especially now since I’m not even sure myself anymore.
- The goblin candy holiday is back. Fortunately, because of the time I spend in other times, I have a couple of months yet to think of a gift. I don’t know what to get him. I don’t want to get anything that makes him think I’m trying to pressure marriage, but at the same time, I want to get him something that shows I love him. I don’t know what would do that. I guess I could get him some alcohol like I did for Winter Veil. It would be something we could drink together. Then maybe some bath stuff so we can take a bath together. I bet they have soap in the shape of penises at that one dirty store. That could be fun, and I think it’s something nice we can do together that isn’t saying I want to get married, so that’s good too.