I think I did something wrong. I’m still not sure what. Everything was going fine, or I thought it was. He arrived to walk with me there a little earlier than I had planned. I was still getting ready, but it wasn’t long. I was just finishing up as he knocked. He gave me a gift. It was a beautiful hair clip which matched my robe perfectly. I’d gotten a new robe, so it was one he hadn’t seen before, so the hair clip was a wonderful surprise.
We went up to the school. The ballroom was amazing. There was so much food and the decorations were all beautiful. There was this really fancy dragonhawk cake too. Hethurin said that Terellion made it. There was some music from enchanted instruments. I think my brother did that. He was always good with music. The night was going so well. We even danced! He’s not a bad dancer.
After that we put our cloaks on and went out to the garden. The air was crisp and chill, but it was nice to be with just him and away from the crowd in the ballroom. We talked for a little bit. If Nessna is to be believed, that’s where things went wrong. I started talking about my parents. It’s been on my mind a lot and we were supposed to be having a good time and I’m not his patient. I just kind of slipped and started talking about it. It wasn’t very long, but Nessna said that guys don’t want girls with troubles, especially on the first date.
Anyway, things were awkward after that. I tried to hold his hand, but I don’t think he liked it. He didn’t kiss me after walking with me back to my house. I was really expecting a kiss. He didn’t even kiss my hand like last time, so I figure something must have went really bad.
Nessna, Lin and Des think I should ask him to kiss me, but I don’t know how to say that without sounding really forward. That reminds me. I need to make more of an effort to protect those girls at the school from making any mistakes. Lin, and even my own sister, Nessna, both admitted to doing things that they shouldn’t have before they were married. Well, Lin hasn’t been married I guess, but I think she’s looking to sleep with more guys! If Nessna is, she better wait until she’s better and can do that kind of thing somewhere else. I don’t want it here! I think they were trying to encourage me to hop in bed with the Confessor. Like that’s going to do any good if he hates me. I’d rather wait until I’m married.
My father has refused to set anything up for me. He thinks I should find my own guy to marry. Well, I tried and failed. I guess I’ll never be with anyone like that. I should just focus on work or something. I’m still taking care of Nessna, though she’s improved greatly, she still needs help on stairs, and I help her take care of Rylad too. After she’s doing better, I can start overseeing the work that needs to be done to build an office in the town.